We experience it as an emotion .
But the feeling of love , the desire to be close to the beloved ,
is actually an unconscious expression of the dynamic nature
of sub-atomic particles eternally trying to regrops into the singularity
that was their primordial state before the big bang blew them apart .

While this knowledge helps to explain almost all human behavior .
Don't even think about it for marriage proposals .

                       Battlestar Galactics
                     

I've been thinking about becoming a polytheist .
No, this has nothing to do with missing Battlestar Galactics .

And yes , I realize my blasphemous notion flies in the face of a few thousand years of
"Ye shall have no other gods before me ."

To be honest , even when I was a kid that commandment trouble me .
It sounded like a jealous girlfriend saying,
If I catch you looking at other girls . You're in big trouble , Mister !  

And don't get me started on how "no other gods before me " kinda implies that
there might actually be some other gods loitering about .
Is that it clearly answers the age-old question

"Why does god allow so much suffering in the world ?"

I believe that
the voices of fear, both from without and within ,
can only be dispelled by trusting the voice that comes from the heart .
Be still and listen to it.

If it speaks of love and compassion for others, for the world itself ,
it just might be the voice of god --
or a reasonable "Line".

If, however,
it snarls with  fear of the unknown,
fear of losing what you have
or of not getting what you want ,
then it just might be the voice of pixies  --
or a reasonable  "Line".

I've been told that
the act of forget her frees the person from harboring dark,
and ultimately self-destructive emotions.

While there is no guarantee that the forget her will be relieved of suffering in the time ,
but will be always feel better .

In other words, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free ?

Here's an update for you.
Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage. why ?
Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage !

I would not exist
without air, water, food, tides, the sun, the moon, night and  you,
music, civilization,  gravity, oceans, a rotating earth,
self-regulating chemical factory that is my body.
Other than that, I like to think of myself as a self-made man.

Okay, that's all the pointless whimsy i have for the moment.

Now unpause your mind,
you can reflect on the redundancy of pointless whimsy later.

I tried meditating on the beach tonight.
" An personal life creating vastness is ever changing."

Ever changing is just a pompous way of saying
Because I am alive in an impersonal universe is sustained by eating other life.

I urgently have to urinate.
What's up with that ?

I understand that the purpose of meditation is not to "clear the mind".
The purpose of meditation is to simply become aware of it without judgmen.

Clearly what blocks me from transcendence is judgment.
Thoughts come and go like clouds moving across an open sky.

The nature of the mind is to create clouds.
The nature of the self is the sky.

When I viewed this sky, it's easy to look  the past time illusion of separateness and see how we are .

Mark Twain said :
“Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.”

After all, how many skies are there ?
Do you believe this ?

                                         San Pedro


The moral feeling of human nature is an obligation,
and we must endow the soul with the sense of aesthetic.

I think we can all agree that cliche
"no pain, no gain," is a fundamental truth.

When we experience physical pain in the gym,
we gain muscles and stamina.
When we endure hardship and sacrifice in order to succeed,
we gain a feeling of satisfaction and achievement.

When we truly embrace emotional pain,
What's we gain a feeling ?

A poem of compassion for the suffering ?
"No dream, no gain,"  

A young girl with eyes like the desert ,
Sounds like heaven, right ?

The most significant thing that can happen to a human being [is]
the separation process of thinking and awareness
and that awareness is "the space in which thoughts exist"

Hardly a day goes by, when I don't think about quitting my dreams.

Hanging it up.
Wearing my beloved shoes go to climb the mountain.

In my imagination , the day after I quit is a wonderful, relaxing, joyful experience.
I can walk on the beach, read, listen to music, eat leisurely meals.

Exercise, meditate, maybe go see a movies,
or take a look around joke-free play filled with people screaming at each other.
And then, after taking the dog for a walk,
climb into bed and fall into a peaceful, stress-free sleep.

The day after that, bored out of my mind,
I start drinking around the clock and quickly descend into a dark,
then frothing madness that leads to either being institutionalized or liver failure
and an agonizing, premature death.

So the really scary part is ?
There's hardly a day goes by when I don't think about quitting  my dreams.

                  


The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it

The memories, emotions, attitudes and thoughts,
that combing to create the self are finally recognized as nothing more then ripples on the surface of a pond.

The unending cycle of birth, life, and death
is a sentence we are souls in prison.

No matter how difficult and confusing life was,
that grim scenario falls apart,
when the minute you ask how hell on earth could,
possibly include miss her.   










  

               


Live as if you were to die tomorrow.
Love as if you were to live forever.

Dear humanity
Live to see a highly educated, deeply thoughtful, articulate,
cool, biracial girl who is not any Injury by childhood.
Like electricity lights a bulb, I light you.

When you strip away all the temporary labels - American,
Iranian, Israeli, Russian, Chines, young man, old woman,
Muslim, Christian, Hindu or Buddhist .....
when those identities are taken away,
and believe me, they eventually will be,
then all that is left of you ....
is me.

Would you know my name?  If I saw you in heaven
Would it be the same? If I saw you in heaven

I must be strong and carry on.
Cause I know I don't belong here in heaven ....

I have somehow stumbled on a magic spell .
It consists of three words that have changed my life for the better.
Those words is : " I don't know "

Now before you get upset by their unremarkable quality,
I'd like you to try a little experiment.
Say the following out loud ;

"I don't know what tomorrow will bring.
I don't know how long I will live.
I don't know how my smart phone works.
I don't know how my body  works.
I don't know how pretty much anything works.
I don't know how pretty you are ... "

Okay, well done !
Now that we've established you lack of knowing,
a vacuum of sorts has been created.
And what do we all know about vacuums?
Nature abhors them, so it stands to reason
that something will rush in to fill that vacuum.

I don't know what it is.
I just know it's magic.

               


You didn't know when you love to somebody,
you was beginning a journey into darkness.
All you knew was bliss.

For a few surreal hours your identity simply melted away.
Of course, you tried to maintain your objectivity.

You think her with love and trying to contact her.

Finally, you entered a sense of devotion all the fear boundaries
which had caused you had first nervous breakdown,
shortly thereafter, although to be so alone as a learning experience.

I want to tell you Qu Yuan

Surrender is a powerful word.
It runs directly counter to everything you was taught.

You was taught to fight for dominance and to struggle to be the best.
And after many years of doing just that, you finally arrived at the mountaintop,
the pinnacle, the hallowed place where eagles crap.

But you was still unhappy, because no matter how hard you fought,
winning was an illusion -- a mirage.

But then, you thought, what would happen if you just only gave up?

The universe is an incomprehensible vastness which created us,  
But it not meant to be dominated you.

If your life passes before you moments before you die,
why not do it when things are going good ?

So you surrendered.
and the Miluo River in which you willingly drowned.

But then, sometimes if you met somebody who was even happier
and more hopeful.
You can guess the rest.